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By thamike.com
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Nerraux Voted THE Gay

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The votes have been taken and tallied. And in a win by the largest margin in history, Nerraux has been voted The Gay.

“To be The Gay is our highest honor,” said Lance Manfred, election organizer. “In the past, we’ve kept this position hidden from mainstream culture. After all, if being gay is tough, being the ‘head gay,’ the ‘source of
all gay’, ‘The Gay’ has to be the hardest thing of all. But Nerraux’s different.

We believe he is so gay that his gayness will radiate out into the world, making it a nice gay place for all of us gays to be.

Up against stiff competition including Rip Taylor, Richard Simmons, and at least three different men who appeared in GAP commercials, Nerraux swept the vote almost unanimously.

“Well, who else were we gonna vote for?” Manfred continued. “ I mean, the gayest of the other candidates was Simmons, and he’s barely a ‘Gene Hackman’ next to Nerrauxˆs ‘Nathan Lane,’ if you know what I mean.”

Nerraux
THE Gay Himself

Nerraux’s term starts in January, 2004. When asked what he plans to do
first, he winked and motioned to the surrounding San Franciscan landscape and said, suavely, “This place is too butch. We’re gonna ‘gay’ it up a bit, and then head East. And we ain’t stoppin’ until this whole fabulous land is in pink boas and pumps!”

God help America.

Written & Submitted by
Joe Hallenbeck


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