More Than Ever Before.
By thamike.com
California Extends FMLA Benefits for Pet Care

In a final act before leaving office, former California Governor Gray Davis signed into legislation Senate Bill 5666 authorizing workers in California to receive up to six weeks paid time off to care for sick or injured pets.  Under the current Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) workers in California receive compensation from their employer if they elect to stay home from work to attend to the needs of a child, spouse, domestic partner, gardener, pool boy, or homeless person.  This bill will extend these benefits to care for pets as well.
People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) lauded this action, stating it was long overdue.  Under the new law, workers are legible to receive compensation when caring for most common household pets.  PETA spokesperson Dick Gere expressed concern that gerbils have been specifically excluded.  He states this was a result of “exaggerated reports” that allege these particular rodents have an “unusual propensity towards unexplained household injuries.”   Gere tells Faux News that an appeal is anticipated.

Davis Giving
The Thumbs Up
On Bill 5666

Although this legislation was championed by Davis, much of the lobbying was performed by grass roots volunteers such as Eileen Overe, a restaurant worker from Berkley.  Overe stated that she became involved in this cause last year after her six year old tabby, named Oscar, fell from a second story balcony.  The day after the accident Oscar was limping badly and craving attention.  Overe stated that, “I wanted to stay home and to comfort him.  I called my boss and explained to him that my pussy was sore all over, and I needed a week or two off to care for it.”   She was told to report to work or risk being fired.  Overe’s employer, Osama’s Rib Shack., so far, has refused to comment on this incident.
In the original draft, this legislation had included a provision for the care of house plants as well.  This was eliminated after stiff resistance from pharmaceutical giant, Pfizer.  Now that he is out of public office, Biff Davis vows to continue his fight for workers to receive paid FMLA rights for house plants.  He has also stated publicly that he would like to eventually see spores, molds, and fungi covered as well.

Written & Submitted by
Dr Dave

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