Faux-Newz - Students Put Compton Elementary School Principle In Coma

Students Put Compton Elementary School Principle In Coma

COMPTON, CA - Principle Lawrence Bishop of Compton's Roosevelt Elementary School was savagely beaten into a coma by 1 of the schools 4 Kindergarten classes earlier this week.

The beating occurred at 2:45 PM on Thursday.

"When Principle Bishop was walking down the hall and heard some commotion coming from Mrs. Ride's Kindergarten classroom, said 5th Grade Hall Monitor Yoseft Stewart. He continued, "The Principle ran to the class room and shut the door and a few moments later I heard yelling and screaming and then silence. I'm not surprised of what happened, it's well known that Mrs. Ride's class is full of thugs, hos and gang-bangers. They are known throughout the school as the "Kinderkizzle's" and they run this school."

"In the hood. You give a time out,
you get knocked the fuck out!"

When interviewed Kindergarten Teacher Samantha Ride said through tears, "Principle Bishop came in the room and told all the children they were on a time out. The whole class suddenly attacked the Principle and there was nothing I could do."

Police and The Compton School Board are currently investigating this assault. There has been no suspensions, expulsions or arrests to date.

Musa "Lil' Muse" Jackson, one of the students involved in the beating was heard saying during recess to some fourth graders as saying, "There ain't no time outs in the hood. You give a time out, you get knocked the fuck out! Kinderkizzle's for life my nizzles."

Written by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
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