Faux-Newz
Now...
More Than Ever Before.
By thamike.com
C1
Black & Blue Friday Transpires In Philadelphia Mall

KING OF PRUSSIA, PA - It's the kind of thing the average consumer fears and dreads. It's the day that people with any kind of sense stay home and just spend time with their loved ones. However, what seemed to be a normal Black Friday at the King Of Prussia Mall turned into a full-fledged riot this year.
 
King of Prussia, a suburb of Philadelphia is known as having one of the biggest malls on the East Coast.
 
Witnesses said that what started out as two older ladies arguing over who was going to purchase the last Hokey Pokey Elmo in stock turned in to a looting free for all.
 
"It was terrible,” said Bea Richards, a grandmother of 5 from Valley Forge. "People were seen beating other people with Swan Lake African American Barbie’s and Neopets all over the place."

Toys
Swan Lake African American
Barbie Is A Goddamn Negro

Hundreds of Police and Ambulance crews had to be dispatched to the mall to settle the shopping carnage and tend to the wounded.
 
KOP mall manager Eric Kemp said in a statement today, "We at KOP feel terrible about what has transpired. We do whole-heartedly apologize to those injured or traumatized by this unfortunate event, but please know that the mall will not be held responsible for what has occurred.
 
The police report on the event listed that 27 people were arrested for looting and violent conduct, and 287 people were treated by paramedics for minor cuts and bruises.
 
There was no word on the status of Swan Lake African American Barbie; however, a lawsuit by the NAACP is feared.

Written by Faux-Newz Staff Writer
Tha Mike


© 2004 faux-newz.com - Fabricated News For The Less Than Holy!
Terms of Service: All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective owners.
Text comments posted on Tha Mike may not be reposted or broadcasted without mentioning faux-newz.com as the source.
C2
   
C4 C3