Scared Straight is comprised of a squadron of death row inmates who are trained in homosexual deprogramming. They infiltrate homosexual hotbeds such as bath-houses and fitness centers, summer camps and John Meyer concerts. Then they, as Scared Straight member, Tom “T-Bone” Anderson puts it, “scare the living shit out of them.”

“We just get in their faces, you know what I’m saying? We don’t back down for a second,” says T-Bone. “ There’s about nine ofus. We big boys, too. After about 15 minutes of us yelling and intimidating some queer, I tell you he start thinking twice about poking another man.”

Although they swear that no physical harm is done, the Scared Straight squad does get very close to their subjects. “Sometimes we get a guy that’s hard to crack, you know,” T-Bone says. “We got to get some alone time. Sometimes it takes a couple of hours of one on one.”

Although Gay Rights groups across the country are up in arms about Bush’s new program, there have been subjects that say they have been helped a great deal.
“T-Bone and Scruggs really rocked my world,” says a former homosexual who wished to remain anonymous. “I want to schedule another scaring session next week.”

Written & Submitted by
Hugo Flores