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Paika
For President!

Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to formally introduce myself. My name is Russell Paika and I am running for President of the United States. My platform is this: This Country Needs Change. Very badly. And we promise we’ll only use it to buy a sandwich...

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"We Were Hijacked By Al Qaeda,
I Had A Great Time!"

A Moroccan-bound jetliner that was hi-jacked over the weekend by an Al Qaeda operative has passengers of the airline raving over how great of an experience they had in his care...

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Southern White Man
Racist To Own Color

Richard Drickle a 43-year-old white man who has lived in Macon his entire life exclaimed to a friend on the phone this week "I really fucking hate white people!"...

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Dasher, and Prancer
Up For Arbitration

With the long off-season having hit full stride, the brass at the North Pole has hit tough financial times, and, pending arbitration, could be looking at the loss of some key Christmas players...

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Newz For The Week Of
2/23/04 - 2/29/04

Issue # 21

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